Believe it or not… This girl does smile.

No, it doesn’t come naturally to my face. And at first, it did look forced. But after learning how to adult, I’ve aced how to show my appreciation of certain things – be it food, a place, an event or show.

Using the cutting edge technology found in a mirror, I have trained my face to use the happiness and nice feelings that are generated on the inside, to scrunch up my face, squint my eyes, raise my cheeks and make the corners of my mouth turn vertically upward.

Thus forth, my chronic bitch face thrives on this challenge. So if you think you can get a smile out of it, get in touch via